Thursday, April 26, 2012

How do you title hurt?

Some days as an infertile woman just suck.
Yup.  I said it.  I went there.
I know, I don't usually, but it is just the way I feel in the moment.
You know, the day when that one more person told you they were pregnant and you put on your fake smile and hugged them and told them you were really excited for them but deep down, you are crying and aching. 

I cry because I am sad.
I laugh because I am happy.
I smile because that sweet little boy is smiling at me and I just can't help it. 
Gosh, I love him dearly and would love to give him a brother.

I am not good with words.  I have much to say, but just not sure how to say it.  We are winding down on Infertility Week and I have been trying to think of something profound to write all week.  Lots of things have crossed my mind, just nothing sounded right.  It still doesn't which is why I have probably erased the last 100 sentences I wrote.  So, I guess that is it for tonight.  Until then....

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