I have been worried about writing about my secondary infertility because of the looks or the comments I may receive. "But you have a child. That is more than some women will ever hope to have." And ya know what, you are right. I am not being selfish. I am ever so grateful for the AMAZING blessing of my sweet little boy. I promised Heavenly Father that I would never take him for granted and I DON'T, but at the end of the day, this is my blog and I can freely write about how I am feeling. If you read my main blog you would know that I don't take a moment for granted! There....now onto the post...
I went to church today. I love church! I love church because of the amazing ward I am in. They are so supportive. They are all so kind. But my ward is full of young, spunky PREGNANT women. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE them dearly! I know several of them have struggled with getting pregnant themselves so I don't hate. :) It is just hard. I am looking at the women at church and wishing it was me. We went to the zoo yesterday and you know what I noticed? All of the pregnant women! *sigh* I am nearly 30 (wow...I said it, it must really be true!) and I really thought I would be done before I was 35. It scares me to think we may not even have #2 before that time! 6 years. 6 years it took me to get pregnant with Tiny Baby. When I was younger, much younger, I pictured myself with 8 children. But times have changed. I think about my family and I see, dream, of 3 little boys. 3 perfect little boys. But if I only get 1, gosh, he sure is perfect!!
Gosh, I love that boy!! Thank you, Heavenly Father, for sending me such an amazing, perfect blessing. If if be thy will, someday I would love to give him a brother. If not, thanks for letting me be his mommy!!